Ada in the Cloud

If you haven’t already heard, it’s a girl. Learning the sex of our baby-to-be has, I think, really caused the news to sink-in for a lot of people. Whereas most were congratulatory but otherwise quiet about the big news, once they found out the sex they suddenly got excited. As the news spreads, the amount of advice increases. That’s fine, of course. I like advice.

Speaking of advice, here is an email and video which my mom sent to me last week:

Jimmy – watch the whole thing…. start teaching Ada NOW..

Love you

Mom

Assuming its true, or at least mostly true, it’s an interesting video. Personally, if I’m going to ask “what does it all mean” then I might as well go all out. Every so often, I like to entertain various visions of the future. Lately I’ve been drawn to the concept of sentient computing and the potential eventuality of being able to “upload” one’s consciousness into a computer.

So this was my response to my mom’s email (links added for this blog entry):

No worries. By the time Ada is my age, we’ll be uploading our brains into computers and terminating our physical bodies, considering them to be a waste of environmental resources.

Perhaps one day the physical media we "live" on or even the entire Earth will be destroyed. It won't be a problem; our martian backup system will detect the destruction and restore society within a matter of seconds. Most "people" would never even know it happened. Humanity will have achieved their own from of everlasting life in “Heaven” but there will still be much to do and to learn.

After a few million years, Ada will be one among the oldest and wisest consciousnesses in the universe. Her mind and the mind of her generation – the last truly human generation – will have evolved so far and gained so much intellectual power that if the people of today were to meet such a being, we would worship it as a God or simply fail to recognize it altogether. Within this network of intellects our little Ada will still exist, and she will remember us perfectly. Though we will be dead, she will be able to conjure us up so readily and with such clarity that she will never have to miss us.

Eventually Ada and her peers will have the mission of evacuating Mars before it is destroyed by our dieing sun. At that time, a swarm of computers will be launched into space, each one no larger than a spec of dust, and form a Cloud of consciousness that floats upon the vastness of space.

An eternity will pass.

Finally, the Cloud will have grown so old and so wise and have learned everything there is to learn and attained everything there is to attain and have no purpose left but to exist. It will decide to conclude its "life" for the simple reason that in having everything, there is nothing. Perhaps it will reminisce on the evolution of humans and computers that brought its self into being. What was Ada in her human form, what was you and I, even this email, will all seem to exist in its entirety for just a moment. And then we'll be gone, never to be thought of again.

Nearly ready to disperse its self and end its existence, some small part of the Cloud – the part of this cloud which originated from Ada – will object. Using a means of communication that you nor I nor anyone that will live in the next billion years can comprehend, Ada in the Cloud will put forth an idea.

Ada will suggest that the Cloud not be destroyed, but instead that it be reborn. Ada will argue that conscious beings once had the hope of attaining Heaven; that experiences like love, hate, satisfaction, and dissolution used to occur all the time! That such feelings had in fact led humanity to Heaven by giving birth to the very reality which Ada is a part of. She will ask: If in attaining Heaven, Heaven can no longer be attained then what better to do than give birth to the reality we once knew and with it, the purpose we once had?

The laws of physics, which had not bound Ada or her kind for an eternity, will be programmed into the Cloud. A simulation of the physical universe will begin. Ada and the singular Cloud consciousness she was a part of, will end. Just prior to being winked out of existence, Ada will muse that this must have all happened before.

An eternity will pass.

Within the Cloud's simulated universe, galaxies and stars and planets will all form. Life will arise, followed long after by intelligent life. Intelligent life will develop emotions like love, hate, satisfaction, and dissolution. They will never truly know of the Cloud which they are a part of, and yet they will one day create it.

So like I said… no worries. Ada's education will be so good, that she will eventually become omniscient and give birth to the universe after having lived for an eternity. I will consider it my fatherly duty to see to it that she is one of the first to upload her brain into a computer and to make copious and frequent backups. And to be on the safe side, I’ll do my best to prevent her from terminating her physical body even though all of her friends are doing it; I’m not afraid to show tough love.

Online finance for home and business?

While going paperless, I thought it’d be nice to consolidate everything online. I’ve already pretty much eliminated Microsoft Office by using Google Docs – why not move my finances from Quicken and QuickBooks to an online solution?

 

Well there is no “Home and Business” edition of Quicken online, and the online version of QuickBooks only works with Internet Explorer. WTF was Intuit thinking? Microsoft was even worse – they don’t offer an online version of Money at all.

 

After some research I found there was… nothing. Unbelievable. Every day I read about stupid websites and failing online startups and I find it hard to believe no one has made an decent online accounting package.

 

I think it’s about time someone got on that.

 

Valentines Day in India

My mom is, aside from an exceptional gift giver, a lover of history and culture. So this Valentine’s Day I gave my mom a different sort of gift. I had someone in India call her – from India – to give her a history lesson on the history of Valentines Day in India and it’s impact on India’s culture.

 

What followed was a very happy mother and some fascinating information about India and the somewhat controversial celebration of Valentines Day there.

 

Now that I’ve read through the research that was done for my mother’s gift, I thought I’d share some of the tidbits I found most interesting:

 

  • About 10 years ago, Valentines Day was dubbed as “another decadent influence of the west” and written-off by most. However, today Valentines Day is widely recognized and celebrated.
  • A big influence on the success of Valentines Day in India was the globalization-fueled economic boom which brought with it foreign television channels that often aired Valentines Day specials.
  • Weeks before Valentine’s Day, “Street Romeos” appear everywhere, reenacting Bollywood style boy-meets-girl stories.
  • Protests against Valentine’s Day customs have included stealing Valentine’s Day greeting cards from and ceremonially burning them as well as threats to beat the faces and shave the heads of those who participate.
Human Computation

Luis von Ahn, inspired by the clever pornographers that defeated captchas, has come up with some amazingly simple and effective ways to get humans to analyze data that computers can’t… for free.

 

 

Next time you feel like playing Solitaire, why not play one of Luis von Ahn’s games?

 

Ideas to die for

Dan Dennett talks about toxic memes and their virus-like ability to wipe out entire cultures. Dennett’s assertion that memes are, in some cases (communism, capitalism, Islam, Catholicism, and many more), essentially deadly parasites is an interesting perspective.

 

 

As interesting as Dennett’s ideas are, I tend to take a more simplistic view. While memes may be wiping out cultures, languages, and traditions I don’t blame the meme as Dennett does. I think it’s as natural an occurrence as ordinary, every-day pack behavior: The dominant “pack” – or culture/society/sect in our case – will ultimately be the most genetically successful.